B spot Express

Today I met with my project manager and a contractor to look over the hood. Honestly even at this point feels surreal to think that I am opening a restaurant. I took some time this week to just sit with my feelings and analyze why I am so doubtful of what is happening & of myself . I realized that it has been so long that I have been saying I am going to open this restaurant without it actually coming into fruition , that I have started to doubt myself or wonder if it was ever going to happen . Working in the trenches for so long , it has been hard to walk in / accept my new role as Owner and Co-founder. Even becoming a father this year has been surreal. Three months in, the responsibility and privilege to be a father is still hard to own and to believe that I am qualified to see through. This helpless little being is looking to me to provide shelter , love , care and protection. Part of the Alce’ name is tied to him. It feels that is the same for this journey of being a restaurateur. Because of my current context and what has been reality for me for over a decade, the idea of me protecting , developing and now bring into fruition this vision of opening my own restaurant and starting a restaurant group just seems like such a vast responsibility that is beyond me. I have been sharing with my wife when she doubts her ability to be a mother that is the very anxiety and worry about her role and ability in motherhood that makes her equipped. She cares so much and sees the vast responsibility of a good mother , that it causes her to doubt if she can reach that level of motherhood. That fear causes her to then strive to be better. I am taking my own advice in this new season. Because I am cognizant to the vast shift in how I move and the weight of leadership and building , this awareness and worry in and of itself makes me worthy . Not because I am perfect ,but rather that I am aware that I am not and will push myself daily to be better and up to the task .

Peace